Q&A: Is Anyone Else a Love Addict, and if So, How Do You Deal With It?
Question by fireheart412: Is anyone else a love addict, and if so, how do you deal with it?
After reading the book, “Facing Love Addiction” by Pia Mellody, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am a love addict. The clinical definition of a love addict is as follows: Love addicts are characteristically familiar with desperate hopes and seemingly unending fears. Fearing rejection, pain, unfamiliar experiences, and having little faith in their ability or right to inspire love, they wait, wish, and hope for love, perhaps their least familiar experience.) I am going to attempt the online meetings of S.L.A.A. to see if they help me arrest my behavior. I don’t want to end up as an insane single person later on in life. If you have the same problem, let me know what you do to overcome your addiction. If you’re unsure, take this 40 question self-diagnosis exam online at the following link: http://www.slaafws.org/pamphlets/40questions.html All I know is that this is killing me inside and hindering my life from being healthy. I could use friends and support from similar people. Thanks!
Best answer:
Answer by Jennifer J
…..A way of summarizing your self-description is to say that your addiction is influenced by low self-esteem. You’re needy but feel unworthy, so you crave love, will do almost anything for it.
I know it goes against your grain, but I suggest you make a list of your best characteristics and personal strengths, including areas of knowledge and skill. Include achievements, even the smallest ones. List everything. Be generous. You will see you have a lot more going for you than you give yourself credit for.
And this is the key, giving yourself credit. Review the list item by item, and acknowledge to yourself that this is a worthy attritribute or accomplishment. DO NOT DISCOUNT ANYTHING…this is the pitfall that contributes to low self-esteem. Give yourself full credit for everything. It’s what people with a strong sense of self-worth and self-confidence do all the time…and you should, too.
This will be the start point for becoming your own best friend. You need to be the first person to encourage you, give you a break, pat you on the back, do something nice for you.
If you make a habit of doing the above, after a while you won’t be so needy. Good luck!
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