Why Is Healing From Male Child Sexual Abuse Important?

Published August 24, 2010

Childhelp USA, children who have experienced severe violence at the hands of their parents, as in the case of incest, are twice as likely to behave violently than children who were not abused.

Sexually traumatized boys may re-enact the abuse by abusing other children or becoming future child sexual abusers. According to Dr. Daniel Sonkin, a leading expert in the sexual abuse of children, 85% of perpetrators were abused as children. The inescapable and unsettling conclusion is that without some significant interruption in the cycle of abuse, children will grow up unable to lead healthy emotional and psychological lives.

The key to stopping the generational cycle of abuse is to encourage early intervention for abused children; as Dr. Sonkin so poignantly states, “healing from one’s victimization is a crucial factor in preventing the sexual abuse of children.” Recovery may be a long and complex process, but without a break in the cycle of abuse, it is unlikely that many of these boys and men will ever become productive or happy members of their own families and communities.

The majority of perpetrators of the sexual abuse of boys tend to be males, are known by the victim, but unrelated to the victim, although women are also perpetrators. They are priests, coaches and the man next door. However, incest is also prevalent. The abuse is often repeated abuse, involving some form of penetration. Shame and male stigmas inhibit boys from getting help or reporting the abuse, so help and counseling are not options in their minds.

When looking more closely at the issue of the sexual abuse of children, the unfortunate reality is when perpetrators do abuse; they are not only abusing one child. According to a recent study by the U.S. Justice Department based on interviews with inmates from 277 prisons, an estimated 43,552 raped or sexually assaulted children under the age of 18; of 327,958 inmates who committed violent crimes of all kinds, 61,037 attacked children. Rape and sexual assault far outdistanced murder, kidnapping and all other violent crimes against children. The study reported that two-thirds of all sex offenders (of all kinds) in prison had attacked children, and a third of the victims were offspring or stepchildren to the attackers. Ninety-seven percent of the perpetrators were men and were more likely to be white. Well over half were married or divorced, and many are repeat offenders. Three of four child molesters committed their crimes in their own home, or the home of the child. Of the victims, 61% said it happened when they were under 18 years old. More than half of the child victims of rape or sexual assault were age 12 or younger.

What happens if these thousands of child victims don’t get help or treatment after the abuse; what will they grow up to be like? How many will perpetrate against children? What impact will this have on our communities? A better question to ask, is what is the potential for these boys if they can get help and heal, and speak out to help end the cycle? What if more powerful programs are available broadcasting the problem, more tools accessible for professionals, and more ways to uncover the secrets and shame of this epidemic?

Individuals, loved ones, and communities need work toward breaking these stigmas. We all need to be pro-active in getting educated to detect signs of abuse, and be instrumental in intervening for the boys that are sexually abused. Get involved in education and prevention in our neighborhoods and communities. Speak in your churches, schools, and families to educate and make a difference. Educate and protect your children. Don’t ever put your head in the sand.

Kathy Barbini

Producer

Big Voice Pictures

Producer/Director

Boys and Men Healing, The Healing Years,

And Social Issue Documentaries