My Boyfriend Is Mentally a child…I Want an Adult Relationship?
Question by Anastasia: My boyfriend is mentally a child…I want an adult relationship?
My boyfriend and I have been together for two and a half years. We’ve been through a lot, and we’ve overcome everything, not easily, but we still got through it.
We have both dealt with addiction for pretty much our entire lives. I got myself together, got a full-time job, go to college full-time, and I got rid of everything negative in my life. For a while, I thought my boyfriend was on the right track to do the same. He’s been sober for almost a year now, but the choices he’s making are just plain idiotic.
He’s been in rehab and recently left because “he didn’t like the founder” of the program. I’ll admit, the founder of the rehab he was in is a complete scumbag, but rehab was the term of his bond and he chose to quit. His sponsor and his advisor made a deal with him and asked him to simply come in to at least two meetings a week, and they will not violate him because he’s breaking the terms of his probation. I thought that was fair, but he’s still choosing not to go.
Instead of staying home and going to his meetings, he’s been hanging out with a few of his idiotic friends. There are three of them, and they live in this disgusting apartment that they don’t take care of. One struggles with addiction as well and is completely mentally UNSOUND. This particular friend slit his throat in front of a bunch of people that were over at this apartment, and these are just people I do not want him associating with.
He won’t give them up, and he’d rather be with them than his family who needs his help at home. His mother and stepdad are older, his brother and his high-risk pregnancy girlfriend are pretty much taking care of everything at home, while my boyfriend just stays out with his friends who aren’t doing anything with their lives either.
He is almost 21, still pitches fits when he doesn’t get his way, got tired of looking for a job because the few he applied for didn’t call him back, doesn’t want to be at home because he’s expected to help them out when they’ve taken care of him and dealt with his addiction, he would seriously rather hang around with deadbeats.
I was addicted to cocaine, alcohol, and pills, and I got my life together QUICK. He’s been addicted to pills and synthetic marijuana, and now he’s complaining that life is too hard. I’m really getting tired of it because he isn’t TRYING. I had to fight tooth and nail to get my life back on track, and he expects it handed to him on a platter.
I love him to death, but I’m ready for an adult relationship. He is mentally a child, and god forbid I bring this up to him because he will only pitch a fit and claim that I’m not “supporting” him when that’s all I’ve ever done.
Please someone give me some advice?
Best answer:
Answer by T
Sorry, your bf is on a one way track to the deepest pit of self made hell imaginable.
Do yourself a favor….walk away.
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
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