Can You Help Me With a Story?

Question by kyrissa: can you help me with a story?
writing a short story and if anyone has any suggestions on what should happen next please send them. thanks.
I staggered over to Juan Grigorio for the last of part of my initiation. Thirteen punches from thirteen members are how I would finally get into the gang. It is how I would finally have a family. I could taste the blood on my lips. The fog condensed in my head. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, waiting for me to fall to the ground. My life depended on this moment. I needed these people, because there was no one else for me. The last set of punches began. I couldn’t even feel them anymore. The last thing is remember from that night was the man who just beat me senseless, other wise known as “The Boss”, telling me that I was in. I was in MS-13 for life.
Living where I do, it was no surprise to me that I would end up in MS-13. In the streets of Los Angeles either you are in a gang or you make sure that you never cross paths with them. My mom and I live in an apartment by ourselves. As far as a father goes, I never had one and it never bothered me because my mom and I were okay. At least that is what we try to make everyone think. The truth is she is addicted to crystal-meth. Since she is high all the time it is up to me to take care of us. Cooking our meals, working to pay the bills, and cleaning up the vomit from when she gets to high. At the age of sixteen I have taken on the role of mother in our house.
To the rest of the world I am Eliana Hernandez, another Honduran trying to survive in LA. In the streets, I am known as Hoopz because I can beat any boy who likes to run his mouth on the court. When I was younger I remember watching the guys from my new family hustle other people from rival gangs, beat them up for walking in their direction, and even kill them for whistling at the women who were considered MS-13 property. I did not always approve of what they did, but since I was kid with no one to care for me I wanted a family. I wanted them because I knew that they would have my back no matter what. Juan “The Boss” Grigorio always took a special interest in me. Asking me to get candy or soda from the gas station down the street for them is how I came to know him and the family. They looked out for me even though I was not an official member yet. The protection increased after I became a member.
“You are part of the family now. If you go anywhere there should always be someone with you. If the cops ever try to question you keep your mouth shut,” Juan said to me the day after my initiation. These were the two rules that I had to live by. I looked around to see everyone in the set sitting in chairs around me. We were sitting in the safe house which was decorated with graffiti of our gang symbols and pictures of the leaders who came before us. The rest of the members were here to celebrate my admission. There were four twelve packs of beer on the counter, and I could smell the smoke from the joints that Raul and Lorenzo were smoking on the couch. Life was one big party to us. We had no problems because we always got what we wanted, whether it was given to us or we had to take it. The next thing I knew Daddy Yankee was busting through the speakers of the stereo. I got up with the rest of my family and started dancing.
While I was dancing I noticed that José Morales was staring at me. Jose was Juan’s right hand man and took care of a lot of business for the family. He was an athletic twenty year old who taught me everything I knew about basketball. The University of Southern California gave him a full scholarship, but his knee gave out during his freshman season and he ended up back in the streets. I looked at him watching me. His muscular arms folded across his broad chest and the mousse in his hair glistened in the light. A toothpick dangled from his mouth. His chiseled jaw matched his tough guy look perfectly. Since José has come back from USC we had been closer than ever and I could not help but have some romantic feelings for him. I knew Juan might disapprove of this because my feeling might get in the way of business so I kept them to myself.

By the look on his face I knew that something was up so I made my way over to the wall he was leaning against.
“So what’s the deal? Did something happen? I am family now so you have to tell me,” I said to him. He smirked at me and looked away. Disappointed I moved in front of his and made his eyes meet mine. His green eyes were normally intense and piercing but that day they were worried and a bit sad. I knew something had to be wrong because José was always had everything under control. I was not about to just give u p on one of my best friends. Besides, after one hundred sixty-nine punches, I think I earned my right to know what was going on so I held my ground. He looked at me softly, took my hands, and led me to the back room were the leaders gathered to discuss important matters. He sat down in his chair and buried is head in his hands. I had never seen him so stressed. Finally, after five minutes of silence he began to explain.

Best answer:

Answer by *[[!STELLAR*RAINBOWS!]]*
WHOAH!!!! i think thats a short story all by its self O_O …..
I didnt even read all of it dude! xD

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